winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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