You work out of a Hotel?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
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I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
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I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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