But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
this beer tastes like vomit already
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
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If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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