She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize