if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize