we made out on top of his cat.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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