There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
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We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
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I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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