But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize