Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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