I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize