thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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