Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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