yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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