Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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