nut hugger
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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