And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize