Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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