he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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