I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
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