Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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