This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
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He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
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I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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