Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize