Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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