She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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