Banned from zoo.
Again?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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