i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize