I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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