Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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