Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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