Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize