Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize