Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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