Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
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Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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