dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Bring me that man meat
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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