i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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