I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize