Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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