I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
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I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
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I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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