Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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