The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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