She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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