yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize