Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize