I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize