if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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