i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
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