Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
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