just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
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i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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