Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
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I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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