i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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